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Dragon Breeder CaptiveBred Addict!
Joined: 28 May 2006 Posts: 536 Location: East Kilbride, Scotland
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Posted: Sat Jul 05, 2008 1:42 pm Post subject: Things you learn from your kids... |
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The following came from an anonymous Mother in Austin, Texas...
Things I've learned from my Boys (honest and not kidding):
1.) A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. ft.
house 4 inches deep
2.) If you spray hair spray on dusters and run over them with roller
blades, they can ignite.
3.) A 3-year old boy's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.
4.) If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not
strong enough to rotate 42 pound boy wearing Batman underwear and a
Superman cape. It is strong enough, however, if tied to a paint can,
to spread paint on all four walls of a 20x20 ft. room.
5.) You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on. When
using a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few
times before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long
way.
6.) The glass in windows (even double-pane) doesn't stop a baseball
hit by a ceiling fan.
7.) When you hear the toilet flush and the words "uh oh", it's already too late
8.) Brake fluid mixed with beer makes smoke, and lots of it.
9.) A six-year old Boy can start a fire with a flint rock even though
a 36-year old man says they can only do it in the movies.
10.) Certain Lego's will pass through the digestive tract of a 4-year old Boy.
11.) Play dough and microwave should not be used in the same sentence.
12.) Super glue is forever.
13.) No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you still
can't walk on water.
14.) Pool filters do not like Jell-O.
15.) VCR's do not eject "salad" sandwiches even though TV commercials
show they do.
16.) Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.
17.) Marbles in petrol tanks make lots of noise when driving.
18.) You probably DO NOT want to know what that odor is.
19.) Always look in the oven before you turn it on; plastic toys do
not like ovens.
20.) The fire department in Austin, Texas a 5-minute response time.
21.) The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms dizzy.
22.) It will, however, make cats dizzy.
23.) Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.
24.) 80% of Men who read this will try mixing the beer and brake fluid.
Those who pass this on to almost all of their friends, with or without
boys, do it because:
a) For those with no children - this is totally hysterical!
b) For those who already have children past this age, this is hilarious.
c) For those who have children this age, this is not funny.
d) For those who have children nearing this age, this is a warning.
e) For those who have not yet had children, this is birth control
Erik _________________ Reptiles by Erik Paterson
1.1.0 Chinese Water Dragon
0.1.0 Bearded Dragon
8.10.11 + 14 eggs Cape House Snake
0.2.1 Leopard Gecko |
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Ailurus Captivebred Communist
Joined: 14 Sep 2006 Posts: 1626 Location: Hertfordshire, England
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Posted: Sat Jul 05, 2008 6:54 pm Post subject: |
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lol that was awesome
must try this
Quote: | 2.) If you spray hair spray on dusters and run over them with roller
blades, they can ignite. |
_________________ Tom
Snakes: :Pantherophis: :Coelognathus: :Lampropeltis: :Heterodon: :Antaresia:
Lizards: :Rhacodactylus: :Pogona: :Goniurosaurus:
http://www.youtube.com/user/Ailurus27 |
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Jack Captivebred Colonel
Joined: 21 Oct 2007 Posts: 2593 Location: west lothian scotland
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quasimodo Forum Granny
Joined: 22 Mar 2007 Posts: 1017 Location: Over the Hill in Horsham
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Posted: Thu Jul 10, 2008 12:19 am Post subject: |
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The beer and brake fluid one did sound rather fun.... I have emailed the link to my grandchildren. Wonder if my daughter will ever speak to me again |
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lol93 Site Moderator
Joined: 29 Aug 2006 Posts: 3172 Location: Glasgow
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Posted: Fri Jul 11, 2008 10:31 am Post subject: |
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Love it! _________________
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Natalia Contributing Member
Joined: 16 Jun 2007 Posts: 76 Location: Liverpool, UK.
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Posted: Fri Jul 11, 2008 12:05 pm Post subject: |
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Ha ha brill!!
I wonder if the Rollerblades and dusters would work next time i skate at the ramps?? _________________ R.I.P Kemari |
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Godzilla Key Member
Joined: 04 Jun 2006 Posts: 238 Location: Uddingston Lanarkshire
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Posted: Tue Jul 15, 2008 7:28 pm Post subject: |
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nice 1 Erik , that was hillarious _________________ 0.3.0 beardies Cheech II, Chong , Melody RIP Cheech I { 9/4/08}
2.7.0 albino royal
1.1.0 fireball royal
1.0.0 pastel royal
1.0.0 spider royal
oodles of normal royals |
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Jack Captivebred Colonel
Joined: 21 Oct 2007 Posts: 2593 Location: west lothian scotland
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quasimodo Forum Granny
Joined: 22 Mar 2007 Posts: 1017 Location: Over the Hill in Horsham
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Posted: Sun Jul 20, 2008 6:06 pm Post subject: |
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Jack wrote: | im gonna try the break fluid one |
What happened ? |
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Jack Captivebred Colonel
Joined: 21 Oct 2007 Posts: 2593 Location: west lothian scotland
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